Here's a different thought on immigration and diversity and its strengths after our Thanksgiving dinner. We invited 12 adults and 2 children to our home for Thanksgiving. Eight of the adults are long term friends, some going back 50 plus years; two were family members (my husband's twin brother and his wife, a friend of mine from college and my sister in law for over 50 years). The two younger adults were the daughter of two of our old friends and the children were their children. Among the older adults all of us are white and all but one grew up middle class, mostly on the east coast. The current administration's real 'Muricans, right? Not so fast.
Only 2 of the ten adults come from any ancestors who qualify as Vance's real Americans. Only two had a southern ancestor. One person descended from a mostly Quaker family that arrived in New England in 1635. The rest of us all come from families with much more recent ancestry in the US. Three were born to moms who were WW2 war brides, two from Germany and one from England. One person was born to an American soldier and his German war bride when he was stationed in Germany; the rest were all born in the US. When it came to their grandparents' generation, three of us had all four grandparents who were born outside the US. Two more had at least two immigrant grandparents. The countries that they came from included England, German (Christian and Jewish), Slovenia, and the Ukraine (both Roman Catholic and Jewish ancestors). Three of the five have had ongoing relationships with relatives who did not immigrate to the US or who immigrated elsewhere.
So then there is the next generation down, which includes the younger couple. Her husband is Chinese American. Her brother is married to a woman whose mom is Filipino. The twin's sister was married to an African American man and our niece is African American and white. The dad of the two children attending is a Chinese American born and raised in the US. Other partners and children born of the older generation include a marriage to a French woman and a French/American grandchild. There is also a partnership between a recently naturalized American of Chinese descent and our nephew. Our late daughter was married to a naturalized American of Filipino descent.
So here we all are: Americans from all parts of the world living and working and being retired after long careers. We've all had challenges and wonderful times together and on our own. We have all given back to this country and have believed in its promise even as we have seen the ways it's history has been harmful as well as good. Some of us have endured racism and homophobia and been denigrated as not full Americans but all of us are as American as JD Vance and Stephen Miller even if they see some of us as "others" and would prefer a world without us. We gave thanks for a lot this Thanksgiving without minimizing the awfulness of our current administration. Day by day, we are just living our lives as Americans as best we can in these difficult times..just a bunch of ordinary Americans..all of us.
It will be easy to think of 2025 as a terrible year for our country, and rightly so, but there have been good things that happened, not least the many times and places where Americans have stood up for themselves and for each other.
Happy Thanksgiving to you and yours, and to all the readers and contributors here !
Lovely column and lovely comments. Thanksgiving has always been my favorite holiday, both as a child of immigrants and the child of parents who came from different religions. What I loved about Thanksgiving as a child is that I felt that it was my holiday just as much as anyone else's, which I didn't feel on religious holidays. It also was a holiday where my parents got together with friends as well as relatives.
That tradition was one my husband and I carried on starting with a Thanksgiving in a cabin in the Colorado mountains that didn't have running water (we got our water from a community spring) but did have an outhouse that looked out on Mt. Meeker a few miles away) where a small group of friends gathered together on a cold fall day. That was in 1970.
For most of the years since we have hosted Thanksgiving (after that year there was running water), first with just friends, then with friends, siblings and parents who came from far away; soon we added children to the mix. Now the parents are gone and children have flown the coop but some of the same crew of friends and siblings will join us as well as newer friends. Some years there will be children and grandchildren there as well. Unfortunately some of the friends and one of children have now also passed away or are too ill to come. The meal will be homemade with sides and appetizers provided by guests. Bob is now making his favorite sour cream apple pie and I just put a cherry pie in the oven. The whole process is a lot more organized and less hectic than in the early days but we still take out the silver and dishes we inherited and dress up.
Still it's a somewhat bittersweet day as we prepare to give thanks. A friend sent a photograph of our late daughter and her husband at one of those Thanksgivings. It brought back so many memories of good times and times where we had more hope for the future. Today, I almost cried while I read about spouses of American citizens who were keeping their final interview appointments with immigration where they were led to believe they were going to get their green cards and, instead, were ripped away from spouses and children and sent off to detention just because Trump has hired the worst excuses for human beings to terrorize those people who had followed the "right" procedures and now were being terrorized by his thugs just because they could be. How low so many have stooped. At the same time, my own goal has become to be one of the people standing up for those (immigrant and citizen) who are suffering because of the policies of this sick, sick administration. I do feel like the country is beginning to wake from this terrible government. We have a long way to go to reclaim what we have lost, but we must start now to make sure our voices are heard.
* Doing what you can - I’m part of a group in Boston assisting asylum-seekers. Can’t fix the political scene but can provide a better day for someone fleeing horror.
* Book group I persuaded to read “Miracle at Philadelphia” and watching the Burns “”American Revolution”. Flawed but amazing USA
Thank you for this, Deb and James. Thanksgiving has always been my favorite holiday, largely because it has been the least corrupted by commercialism, un-tainted by faux patriotism, and the most family focused. Despite ample evidence to the contrary, I still believe that the vast majority of Americans are decent, hard working, mutually respectful folks who want what is best for all of us, regardless of sex, sexual orientation, race, color, employment status, religion or lack thereof. I also believe that as these hard working folks continue to see how disrespectful, dishonest, proudly ignorant, and just plain nasty folks in the Trump administration continue to do all they can to undermine what is good for all of us, they will come to the next few elections with motivation to change things for the better. I have no illusions that this will change things overnight, as the damages are already profound----but I do believe in the ebb and flow of good and bad throughout history---and we are overdue for some good.....Fingers crossed.....
I spent 6 Thanksgivings on the African continent: 3 in Cairo and 3 in Accra. I know what you mean about Americans getting together to celebrate Thanksgiving.
One evening in mid-November in Cairo, several US colleagues were having dinner in a Koshari restaurant. Koshari is a ubiquitous, delicious (to some!), Egyptian staple that has thin sliced, crumbled, deep fried onion rings on top. One of my colleagues asked if she could get a package of just the onion rings to take with her - for her green bean casserole. After some verbal calisthenics to overcome the language barrier and explain that she didn't want a take away container of Koshari but only the rings, she got what she asked for, and our feast included the essential GB casserole, properly adorned.
Oh, the memories!! Indeed grateful to have had the opportunity to live & teach overseas, and grateful for the many "helpers" (to quote the late, great Mister Rogers) we see around us every day, quietly working for the good of all, usually unnoticed.
Long ago, we had our first overseas-Thanksgiving in Oxford. The struggle then was to find the appropriate fowl. We ended up with a goose.
Decades, after that, in Shanghai, we worked with a local restaurant staff to explain that we were *not* looking for a duck. They eventually found what we suspect was an exceptionally large chicken. We had a great time with a group of friends.
The Citizen Historians and the Save Our Signs project are sort of the non-electronic version of the internet’s Wayback Machine, saving history before it is erased.
Jim I also remember Thanksgivings in foreign lands.
We have much to be thankful for with family and friends.
That turkey in the White House might reflect that our first Thanksgiving was when Native Americans provided a feast for some hungry immigrants from across the Atlantic.
Keith, thank you — and for the reminder of the origin-story. (Which I think the WSJ editorial page, for all its flaws, prints every year at this time. We'll see, tomorrow. )
Thank you for this. There is nothing that makes me feel more positive about our country than getting involved in making my neighborhood and city a better place for everyone. There is much we can do to help elected leaders and city government as private citizens.
I'd also like to call out the efforts of Chuck Marohn and the Strong Towns movement, which has been working for a couple of decades (or more) now, proposing ways for towns and cities to become more resilient. They're also strong advocates for putting people before cars in our roadway designs, especially in urban and suburban settings (https://www.strongtowns.org/; Chuck also has a Substack at https://clmarohn.substack.com/). If you want to get more involved in civic improvement, Strong Towns is a great place to start.
I especially love their mantra:
- Humbly observe where people in the community struggle;
- Ask: what is the next smallest thing we can do right now to address it?
You are right that Thanksgiving has a special meaning when you’re living overseas. Throughout my career, at whatever post, the Ambassador and his senior officers would confer and go down the list of single staff members to ensure that each one of them had an invitation to a family Thanksgiving.
This is a lovely and necessary commentary. And next time you are in Los Angeles, visit the Metro YMCA (26 sites across LA County) to witness how the organization has stepped up to address food insecurity, homelessness, and the challenges faced by undocumented people who fear leaving their homes. The Y works closely with local government, NGOs, and the business community to make things better in these dispiriting times.
Wow, thank you. We are lifelong YMCA fans, members, and patrons, at sites all around the country. Had not known this about their LA County work. Will check it out.
Here's a different thought on immigration and diversity and its strengths after our Thanksgiving dinner. We invited 12 adults and 2 children to our home for Thanksgiving. Eight of the adults are long term friends, some going back 50 plus years; two were family members (my husband's twin brother and his wife, a friend of mine from college and my sister in law for over 50 years). The two younger adults were the daughter of two of our old friends and the children were their children. Among the older adults all of us are white and all but one grew up middle class, mostly on the east coast. The current administration's real 'Muricans, right? Not so fast.
Only 2 of the ten adults come from any ancestors who qualify as Vance's real Americans. Only two had a southern ancestor. One person descended from a mostly Quaker family that arrived in New England in 1635. The rest of us all come from families with much more recent ancestry in the US. Three were born to moms who were WW2 war brides, two from Germany and one from England. One person was born to an American soldier and his German war bride when he was stationed in Germany; the rest were all born in the US. When it came to their grandparents' generation, three of us had all four grandparents who were born outside the US. Two more had at least two immigrant grandparents. The countries that they came from included England, German (Christian and Jewish), Slovenia, and the Ukraine (both Roman Catholic and Jewish ancestors). Three of the five have had ongoing relationships with relatives who did not immigrate to the US or who immigrated elsewhere.
So then there is the next generation down, which includes the younger couple. Her husband is Chinese American. Her brother is married to a woman whose mom is Filipino. The twin's sister was married to an African American man and our niece is African American and white. The dad of the two children attending is a Chinese American born and raised in the US. Other partners and children born of the older generation include a marriage to a French woman and a French/American grandchild. There is also a partnership between a recently naturalized American of Chinese descent and our nephew. Our late daughter was married to a naturalized American of Filipino descent.
So here we all are: Americans from all parts of the world living and working and being retired after long careers. We've all had challenges and wonderful times together and on our own. We have all given back to this country and have believed in its promise even as we have seen the ways it's history has been harmful as well as good. Some of us have endured racism and homophobia and been denigrated as not full Americans but all of us are as American as JD Vance and Stephen Miller even if they see some of us as "others" and would prefer a world without us. We gave thanks for a lot this Thanksgiving without minimizing the awfulness of our current administration. Day by day, we are just living our lives as Americans as best we can in these difficult times..just a bunch of ordinary Americans..all of us.
What a wonderful column.
It will be easy to think of 2025 as a terrible year for our country, and rightly so, but there have been good things that happened, not least the many times and places where Americans have stood up for themselves and for each other.
Happy Thanksgiving to you and yours, and to all the readers and contributors here !
Thank you! Thankfulness from Dallas, where we are visiting one of our sons and his family.
Lovely column and lovely comments. Thanksgiving has always been my favorite holiday, both as a child of immigrants and the child of parents who came from different religions. What I loved about Thanksgiving as a child is that I felt that it was my holiday just as much as anyone else's, which I didn't feel on religious holidays. It also was a holiday where my parents got together with friends as well as relatives.
That tradition was one my husband and I carried on starting with a Thanksgiving in a cabin in the Colorado mountains that didn't have running water (we got our water from a community spring) but did have an outhouse that looked out on Mt. Meeker a few miles away) where a small group of friends gathered together on a cold fall day. That was in 1970.
For most of the years since we have hosted Thanksgiving (after that year there was running water), first with just friends, then with friends, siblings and parents who came from far away; soon we added children to the mix. Now the parents are gone and children have flown the coop but some of the same crew of friends and siblings will join us as well as newer friends. Some years there will be children and grandchildren there as well. Unfortunately some of the friends and one of children have now also passed away or are too ill to come. The meal will be homemade with sides and appetizers provided by guests. Bob is now making his favorite sour cream apple pie and I just put a cherry pie in the oven. The whole process is a lot more organized and less hectic than in the early days but we still take out the silver and dishes we inherited and dress up.
Still it's a somewhat bittersweet day as we prepare to give thanks. A friend sent a photograph of our late daughter and her husband at one of those Thanksgivings. It brought back so many memories of good times and times where we had more hope for the future. Today, I almost cried while I read about spouses of American citizens who were keeping their final interview appointments with immigration where they were led to believe they were going to get their green cards and, instead, were ripped away from spouses and children and sent off to detention just because Trump has hired the worst excuses for human beings to terrorize those people who had followed the "right" procedures and now were being terrorized by his thugs just because they could be. How low so many have stooped. At the same time, my own goal has become to be one of the people standing up for those (immigrant and citizen) who are suffering because of the policies of this sick, sick administration. I do feel like the country is beginning to wake from this terrible government. We have a long way to go to reclaim what we have lost, but we must start now to make sure our voices are heard.
Thank you for these powerful and, yes, bittersweet memories. I agree about the specialness of this holiday.
Uplifting commentaries without denying the unusual nature of these challenging times...
Thank you, Jim and Deb... and Happy Thanksgiving to you and yours and all here.
Thank you, Ed!
Wonderful stuff from you two…
* Doing what you can - I’m part of a group in Boston assisting asylum-seekers. Can’t fix the political scene but can provide a better day for someone fleeing horror.
* Book group I persuaded to read “Miracle at Philadelphia” and watching the Burns “”American Revolution”. Flawed but amazing USA
Thanks. Ann Tomsho
Ann, thank you. Agree that the new Burns series is gripping and important. (And I remember 'Miracle' from long ago.) Happy T-day.
Thank you for this, Deb and James. Thanksgiving has always been my favorite holiday, largely because it has been the least corrupted by commercialism, un-tainted by faux patriotism, and the most family focused. Despite ample evidence to the contrary, I still believe that the vast majority of Americans are decent, hard working, mutually respectful folks who want what is best for all of us, regardless of sex, sexual orientation, race, color, employment status, religion or lack thereof. I also believe that as these hard working folks continue to see how disrespectful, dishonest, proudly ignorant, and just plain nasty folks in the Trump administration continue to do all they can to undermine what is good for all of us, they will come to the next few elections with motivation to change things for the better. I have no illusions that this will change things overnight, as the damages are already profound----but I do believe in the ebb and flow of good and bad throughout history---and we are overdue for some good.....Fingers crossed.....
Thank you. Agree about this being the best holiday. Appreciate it.
I spent 6 Thanksgivings on the African continent: 3 in Cairo and 3 in Accra. I know what you mean about Americans getting together to celebrate Thanksgiving.
One evening in mid-November in Cairo, several US colleagues were having dinner in a Koshari restaurant. Koshari is a ubiquitous, delicious (to some!), Egyptian staple that has thin sliced, crumbled, deep fried onion rings on top. One of my colleagues asked if she could get a package of just the onion rings to take with her - for her green bean casserole. After some verbal calisthenics to overcome the language barrier and explain that she didn't want a take away container of Koshari but only the rings, she got what she asked for, and our feast included the essential GB casserole, properly adorned.
Oh, the memories!! Indeed grateful to have had the opportunity to live & teach overseas, and grateful for the many "helpers" (to quote the late, great Mister Rogers) we see around us every day, quietly working for the good of all, usually unnoticed.
Thanks for the reminder.
Thank you, and love the Koshari story.
Long ago, we had our first overseas-Thanksgiving in Oxford. The struggle then was to find the appropriate fowl. We ended up with a goose.
Decades, after that, in Shanghai, we worked with a local restaurant staff to explain that we were *not* looking for a duck. They eventually found what we suspect was an exceptionally large chicken. We had a great time with a group of friends.
The Citizen Historians and the Save Our Signs project are sort of the non-electronic version of the internet’s Wayback Machine, saving history before it is erased.
Jack, excellent comparison, thank you.
I'm very thankful for this post! It was just what I needed, to keep doing what I can, when and how I can! Grateful to be an American!
Dawn, thank you. Thankful for all you are doing, in the US and around the world.
Jim I also remember Thanksgivings in foreign lands.
We have much to be thankful for with family and friends.
That turkey in the White House might reflect that our first Thanksgiving was when Native Americans provided a feast for some hungry immigrants from across the Atlantic.
Keith, thank you — and for the reminder of the origin-story. (Which I think the WSJ editorial page, for all its flaws, prints every year at this time. We'll see, tomorrow. )
Thank you for this. There is nothing that makes me feel more positive about our country than getting involved in making my neighborhood and city a better place for everyone. There is much we can do to help elected leaders and city government as private citizens.
I'd also like to call out the efforts of Chuck Marohn and the Strong Towns movement, which has been working for a couple of decades (or more) now, proposing ways for towns and cities to become more resilient. They're also strong advocates for putting people before cars in our roadway designs, especially in urban and suburban settings (https://www.strongtowns.org/; Chuck also has a Substack at https://clmarohn.substack.com/). If you want to get more involved in civic improvement, Strong Towns is a great place to start.
I especially love their mantra:
- Humbly observe where people in the community struggle;
- Ask: what is the next smallest thing we can do right now to address it?
- Do that thing. Do it right now.
- Repeat.
Barbara, thank you. And agree in your support and admiration for Strong Towns.
You are right that Thanksgiving has a special meaning when you’re living overseas. Throughout my career, at whatever post, the Ambassador and his senior officers would confer and go down the list of single staff members to ensure that each one of them had an invitation to a family Thanksgiving.
That's a beautiful thing they did.
Let us hope that this tradition has continued. Thank you.
The Foreign Service has faults, but abandoning tradition is not one of them.
Excellent. Thank you.
We send our appreciation back to you, on all fronts.
This is a lovely and necessary commentary. And next time you are in Los Angeles, visit the Metro YMCA (26 sites across LA County) to witness how the organization has stepped up to address food insecurity, homelessness, and the challenges faced by undocumented people who fear leaving their homes. The Y works closely with local government, NGOs, and the business community to make things better in these dispiriting times.
Wow, thank you. We are lifelong YMCA fans, members, and patrons, at sites all around the country. Had not known this about their LA County work. Will check it out.